As I hang up the phone from talking with a co-worker, who is having a hard time getting over a very emotionally abusive ex-boyfriend, I wonder how many of us stay connected to people who truly don’t deserve us. I sympathized with her because I too had just gotten out of a horrible relationship. It was filled with lots of arguments and bad behavior.

I’ve never been afraid to be alone. I actually prefer it that way however I met this guy and we hit it off immediately. He was nice and charming not to mention very handsome. He said all the right things and before you knew it, I was in love. I mean head over heels in love. Like, do anything he wanted me to do love. I was gone ya’ll!! As the years passed and the relationship developed so did many problems. We were both verbally abusive to each other and it eventually got to be too much. But I was determined to stick it out even at the detriment of my well being. It was so unhealthy! I think I would have stayed if it had not been for him breaking it off.

At times, he was loving and caring, making me feel as if I was the greatest blessing he had been given. And when he went into business mode, I was completely turned on! It was something about his authoritative tone and how he connected the dots in business that was so attractive. But most times, he was ugly, nasty and manipulative. He never accepted responsibility for his actions. There was always a double standard in our relationship. It was ok if he did something, but if I did the same thing I was wrong. He left me several times for various stupid reasons but I always took him back. He promised to do better and so did I but honestly we never did. I guess we thought love would always bind us together but was love enough?

Love will never be enough if you’re with the wrong person. There will always be something wrong and things will never be ok. We must value ourselves enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves us. If others don’t see our value, we must! Love is a great emotion to have however love must never be at the detriment of our wellbeing.