Being in love is a splendid and pleasant thing. It’s nice to have someone in your life that you can spend time with and you can share things with. It’s a great feeling to have someone that you belong to and they belong to you. But what happens when that love starts to fade? What do you do when things start to go left and you see things may not work out? What do you do when the love starts to hurt?

I’ve never been in a physically abusive relationship but I have encountered verbal abuse in a relationship. It doesn’t feel good to be told that you are not good enough or you are called ugly and degrading names. Where is the love in all of that? Love shouldn’t hurt! But when it does, things must either change or you need to get out.

I was once in love with someone that I thought might last. We were so into each other and it felt so right. I was rebounding from my divorce and I don’t think we really spent a lot of time getting to know each other very well. I honestly wasn’t emotionally ready for a relationship. But it felt good being with him. After some months, we discovered the relationship wasn’t healthy for us. We were hurting each other and we needed to get out of it before we caused any more damage to each other. It was a hard decision but it was necessary.

I think when the emotional abuse starts it’s only a matter of time before the physical abuse begins. It’s only gonna take one of you to get mad enough to start putting your hands on the other one. And for me, that is a place where there is no turning back from. If emotional abuse has started, please either seek help or choose to get away from each other.

Being in love is great. But not when it hurts. When love begins to hurt, try to see what’s the root cause and get help. Counseling or some time apart may be the cure. But don’t stay in a relationship that is not healthy for you.